The moment I realised I wanted to, had to, do it was about this time last year. It was a complete fluke. A basic problem became a full emergency. Vomiting blood, ECG’s, intravenous antibiotics and uncontrollable shivering at 5am.
As we rushed to A&E all sorts went through my mind. I had had a bladder infection earlier in the week but the antibiotics had started working, though, the day before there was blood again in my urine. What could be wrong?
The hospital was only a mile away. I was panicking. I had never felt this way before and could not stop shaking. My teeth rattled in my mouth. My partner at the time was very good. He took control and helped me dress.
I’d made the mistake of taking a warm shower to try and warm up. The Nurse looked at me disapprovingly when I said this. I was rushed past waiting queues of people on a trolley to an area of the hospital that was right under an air conditioning unit. My temperature was dangerously high.
The great thing about this whole crazy situation that has happened in the last 6 months is I have gotten to spend lots more time with my Nan. I now live with her.
I would have dedicated a holiday to her 6 months ago and while we are still very close I can no longer call her a distant relative.
I would have to dedicate one to my Dad. No longer with us (you can’t get any more distant than that) sadly I think he should have his birthday as a holiday.
My Dad got few of the things he ever really wanted. He got me and he finally got himself a Jaguar car in the mid-nineties but apart from that he was extremely unlucky.
He lost his Dad at 13 and his mother in his late 20’s. He was in and out of jobs all his life with no formal education. His health was bad for about 10 years before he died and he didn’t deserve to suffer as he did.
On his birthday (April 19th) we can have a day where we all do something we have wanted to do for a long time. Tick one off the bucket list perhaps?